Sometimes, Curious Lady needs a clone. This past week, she helped to coordinate a teen fashion show and even worked with the DJ, started editing articles for a newsletter, and practiced her lead part in the church choir....and those are just the interesting activities. A good friend of mine gave me an article a couple weeks ago and thought it would make good fodder for Dare to Disagree. It took me a while, but I'm finally sitting down to write about it. If any of you come across articles that you would like me to opine on, send them to me at [email protected]
The article comes from YCteenmag.org and is written by an 8th grade girl who spoke up against sexism in her school. Alice Markham-Cantor had been bothered by sexist views "since a current events lesson during 7th grade history class, when the topic of discrimination in the presidential election came up...one boy—who I’d thought was sensible—rolled his eyes and told me, 'Come on. There’s no sexism anymore.'" At that point, Markham-Cantor realized two things: many boys didn't think sexism existed, and many girls were aware of sexism but considered it normal.
I'm really not all that concerned with the girls who thought sexism was normal. At some point in their lives, they will (hopefully) realize that they have the power to change the prevalence of sexism around them. I am, however, interested that the boys thought sexism went the way of the dinosaurs. My only explanation for this is that too many people accept instances of sexism and too few people speak out against it.
Markham-Cantor's interest in sexism earned her the nickname, "the 8th grade feminist", which bought with it a new volley of assumptions: "in boys’ minds the label 'feminist seemed to go hand in hand with the label 'lesbian'". While not offended or angered, it was puzzling to Markham-Cantor that many people "automatically associated the fight for women's rights with not liking men. It was as if they thought that straight women should be content with male dominance, and that a woman would only stand up for other women if she was attracted to them. This is a...lopsided assumption—do men only stand up for each other if they’re gay?" I certainly consider myself a feminist, but not in the traditional, archaic sense of the word. I don't burn my bras, I shave all my unwanted hair (TMI perhaps, but oh well....), and I don't think men are crap (simple and maddening, yes...crap, no). I believe that women don't get enough credit for being able to do certain tasks like manual labor as well as men. I don't believe that a woman's place is merely in the home. I take offense to the fact that women are paid 75 cents for every dollar earned by a man for the same job. Perhaps worst of all is the fact that a man can speak his mind and he's hailed as assertive and outspoken. But let a woman speak her mind, however politely she may do it, and she's labelled a bitch.
Markham-Cantor muses, "one of the criticisms I've heard of feminists is that men find them 'too hard to like.' When I heard that for the first time, I thought, 'Excuse me? Why? Because we’re not subservient? If that’s what you ‘like’ in a woman, I’d advise you rethink your tastes.' A man who seeks out women who won’t challenge him is not only cowardly, but will have a much more boring life." It is this thinking that pervades American culture for some reason. Women think that they have to dumb themselves down just to appear more attractive to men. I think this just breeds insecure chauvinists who feel threatened by strong women. This thinking also breeds vapid, insecure women who feel they can't truly be themselves out of fear of being rejected and alone. But then that comes back to the idea that if someone can't handle you as you are, then they're not worth your time.
I strongly urge women everywhere to change their mindset about sexism and the definition of a feminist. "I refuse to be subservient. I will speak my mind, and I will challenge sexism."
The article comes from YCteenmag.org and is written by an 8th grade girl who spoke up against sexism in her school. Alice Markham-Cantor had been bothered by sexist views "since a current events lesson during 7th grade history class, when the topic of discrimination in the presidential election came up...one boy—who I’d thought was sensible—rolled his eyes and told me, 'Come on. There’s no sexism anymore.'" At that point, Markham-Cantor realized two things: many boys didn't think sexism existed, and many girls were aware of sexism but considered it normal.
I'm really not all that concerned with the girls who thought sexism was normal. At some point in their lives, they will (hopefully) realize that they have the power to change the prevalence of sexism around them. I am, however, interested that the boys thought sexism went the way of the dinosaurs. My only explanation for this is that too many people accept instances of sexism and too few people speak out against it.
Markham-Cantor's interest in sexism earned her the nickname, "the 8th grade feminist", which bought with it a new volley of assumptions: "in boys’ minds the label 'feminist seemed to go hand in hand with the label 'lesbian'". While not offended or angered, it was puzzling to Markham-Cantor that many people "automatically associated the fight for women's rights with not liking men. It was as if they thought that straight women should be content with male dominance, and that a woman would only stand up for other women if she was attracted to them. This is a...lopsided assumption—do men only stand up for each other if they’re gay?" I certainly consider myself a feminist, but not in the traditional, archaic sense of the word. I don't burn my bras, I shave all my unwanted hair (TMI perhaps, but oh well....), and I don't think men are crap (simple and maddening, yes...crap, no). I believe that women don't get enough credit for being able to do certain tasks like manual labor as well as men. I don't believe that a woman's place is merely in the home. I take offense to the fact that women are paid 75 cents for every dollar earned by a man for the same job. Perhaps worst of all is the fact that a man can speak his mind and he's hailed as assertive and outspoken. But let a woman speak her mind, however politely she may do it, and she's labelled a bitch.
Markham-Cantor muses, "one of the criticisms I've heard of feminists is that men find them 'too hard to like.' When I heard that for the first time, I thought, 'Excuse me? Why? Because we’re not subservient? If that’s what you ‘like’ in a woman, I’d advise you rethink your tastes.' A man who seeks out women who won’t challenge him is not only cowardly, but will have a much more boring life." It is this thinking that pervades American culture for some reason. Women think that they have to dumb themselves down just to appear more attractive to men. I think this just breeds insecure chauvinists who feel threatened by strong women. This thinking also breeds vapid, insecure women who feel they can't truly be themselves out of fear of being rejected and alone. But then that comes back to the idea that if someone can't handle you as you are, then they're not worth your time.
I strongly urge women everywhere to change their mindset about sexism and the definition of a feminist. "I refuse to be subservient. I will speak my mind, and I will challenge sexism."